Better Than a Hallelujah Sometimes
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Photo by Lukas
Originally published April 23, 2015
“What I see more than anything else is an unquestioning embrace of performancism in all sectors of life. Performancism is the mindset that equates our identity and value directly to our performance and accomplishments. Performancism casts achievemet not as something we do or don’t do but as something we are or aren’t...
This is not to say that accomplishments are somehow bad or even that they aren’t incredibly important. It is simply to say that there is a difference between taking pride in what we do and worshipping it. When we worship at the altar of performance—and make no mistake performancism is a form of worship—we spend our lives frantically propping up our images or reputations, trying to do it all—and do it all well—often at a cost to ourselves and those we love.”
This reminds me of a Lewis Smedes quote (paraphrased), "We feel guilt because we've done something wrong. We feel shame because we are something wrong."
Performancism demands perfection. We are incapable of perfection. We can perform well at times and achieve success and meet goals, but not to the level of perfection. This doesn't keep us from trying however because performancim becomes our identity. Succeeding in our performance brings rewards, desirable labels, popularity, respect, etc. We eventually lose any sense of identity, significance, or worth apart from our success, and so we frantically drive ourselves to maintain our current level of success or improve upon it.
In applying this to our faith, performancism takes the focus off our Savior Jesus and places it on us. We look to our performance as our savior which in reality is making me the god of my life. I'm continually looking at my efforts and allowing the results of my efforts to define whether I am acceptable or good enough.
A performer in the most basic sense is someone who is on a stage and all eyes are on that stage. Whether acting on Broadway, singing on American Idol, or dancing on Dancing with the Stars, the performer is the focus. Applying this to our faith walk, when performance becomes the measuring stick, it is no longer my best for His glory, but my best for my glory. It becomes all about me. I don't think it's usually a concious decision but either a gradual process or just the result of the way we've been taught and trained as to how a Christian is supposed to be.
The sad truth is that although our motives may be pure the results are far from the life Jesus wants for us. Jesus desires a relationship with us. He does not want to be viewed as the judge who critiques every little misstep and only offers praise when we perform well. The reality is that he offers us acceptance right where we are. Whether that's in a ditch this morning after a drinking or drug binge, in the bed of someone you just met, or taking care of lepers in India. He accepts us and reaches out his hand to help us. He wants to help us by showing us that we are loved period. Good behavior or performance doesn't make him love us more, and bad behavior and habits don't make him love us less. It's not because of what we've done or not done, but because of his nature of perfect love.
I love this line from Amy Grant's song, "God loves the drunkard's cry, the soldier's plea not to let him die, better than a hallelujah sometimes...We pour out our misery, God just hears a melody. Beautiful the mess we are, the honest cries of breaking hearts, are better than a hallelujah sometimes."
This is not to say that sin is okay, and that we can live any way we want. Sin is destruction with far reaching consequences. It's so serious that in order to give us a chance at life and a way out, Jesus the Son of God came to our world to pay my price and your price, for my sin and your sin.
6 Well then, should we keep on sinning so that God can show us more and more of his wonderful grace? 2 Of course not! Since we have died to sin, how can we continue to live in it? 3 Or have you forgotten that when we were joined with Christ Jesus in baptism, we joined him in his death? 4 For we died and were buried with Christ by baptism. And just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glorious power of the Father, now we also may live new lives." Romans 6:1-4 (NLT)
That is the bottom line. It is because of JESUS alone that we are acceptable and pleasing to God. We cannot earn or buy His acceptance with any amount of effort and or good performance.
The Message version of 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 speaks this truth plainly. "If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God's word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything as plain as day, and if I have fatih that says to a mountain, "Jump" and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. If I give all I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love."
If we view God as this judge who is impossible to please, or even if it's a more subtle nagging feeling of constant guilt, we've probably fallen into the performance trap. It is exhausting being on that stage 24/7. The spotlight isn't meant to be on us. I don't know about you but I haven't been helped much by a performer who looks and acts like they have it all together. I end up feeling worse about myself. It's the people who have been willing to be real and transparent and walk alongide me in the good times and bad that have helped me. That's exactly what Jesus does for us.
When he finds us in the ditch he offers to carry us out and place us on solid ground. He invites us to be real with him. To ask the hard questions and be honest about our anger and hurt. On the other end of the spectrum if your a pastor, missionary, believing housewife, or business man who finds yourself burnt out, impatient, and disillusioned; tired of trying and failing, JUMP off that stage. Jesus will catch you and give you rest.
I'll be honest, I've been in the "drunken ditch" so to speak and I've been the "performing Christian". I still struggle with the desire to be a people pleaser but God is good and He helps me everyday. My story in a nutshell is found in Psalm 40:1-6, 11 and it's my prayer that you will find yours there too.
“I waited patiently for the LORD to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be astounded. They will put their trust in the LORD. Oh the joys of those who trust the LORD, who have no confidence in the proud, or in those who worship idols. O LORD my God, you have done many miracles for us. Your plans for us are too numerous to list. If I tried to recite all your wonderful deeds, I would never come to the end of them. You take no delight in sacrifices or offerings. Now that you have made me listen, I finally understand—you don’t require burnt offerings or sin offerings... Lord, don’t hold back your tender mercies from me. My only hope is in your unfailing love and faithfullness.”